Avocado Toast Economics

Personalized Horoscope Subscription

Worth: 5 avocado toasts

Find out which Mercury retrograde will ruin your life next!

A Custom Succulent Garden

Worth: 7 avocado toasts

Look, they might die because you’ll forget to water them, but at least they look good for a few weeks!

Designer AirPods Case

Worth: 8 avocado toasts

Protect your overpriced wireless earbuds in style! Bonus points if you accidentally lose them within a week.

Artisanal Kombucha Starter Kit

Worth: 12 avocado toasts

Brew your own batch of hipster fuel at home, because store-bought just isn’t niche enough.

Retro Polaroid Camera

Worth: 25 avocado toasts

For when your smartphone's perfectly good camera just isn’t vintage enough.

A Year’s Supply of Kale

Worth: 20 avocado toasts

Enough kale to fill a gym membership’s worth of green smoothies. But let’s be real—half of it will rot in the fridge.

A Year’s Supply of Activated Charcoal Detox Water

Worth: 30 avocado toasts

Because why not drink something that looks like you scooped it out of a coal mine?

VR Headset for Virtual Brunches with Friends

Worth: 40 avocado toasts

Because actual human interaction is so 2019.

A Single Cryptocurrency (That’s Already Crashed)

Worth: 50 avocado toasts

Don’t worry, this digital coin is a sure thing... except when it’s not.

A Mortgage You'll Regret for 30 Years

Worth: 60,000 avocado toasts

Why invest in avocado toast when you can spend decades paying off a house?